Pub date: available now

Whether they transpired as the result of inaccurate translation or sheer stupidity, this collection of real product instructions will leave you amused, bemused and baffled.

On a tub of ice cream – ‘Caution: ice cream is cold.’ On a bathroom heater – ‘This product is not to be used in bathrooms.’ On a bottle of rum – ‘Open bottle before drinking.’ On a microwave oven – ‘Do not use for drying pets.’